Throughout my life, there have been many places that embodied what spirituality meant to me at that time. For a long time, that place of spirituality was on the pitch. Soccer was how I expressed myself and I was good at it. It was where I could be all the things I dreamed of myself being. It was also a place where I had to face many fears to achieve excellence.
As I have gotten older, that place has changed. I spent a month in the hills and mountains of Nepal. In the months before that I spent a lot of time hiking the trails available in the gorge and in Central Oregon. They have become a place of peace mixed with turmoil, camaraderie and isolation, happiness and despair. My travels to Nepal really nailed home the idea of the mountains being a place of spirituality. For starters, they are geological formations that people in the United States can't even imagine. It was hard enough for me to imagine them while walking amongst the giants. Their foothills are our mountains and to be in such a place where grandeur, glory, fury and a feeling of being utterly small, has left me near speechless about the wonder those alluring mountains possessed.
Again, my place of spirituality has changed. It has been brought to what I would consider a concept of infinite; my mind. I am best able to experience this place when I run. It is through doing the motions of running, where my body takes control via a rhythmic cadence taking me from point A to point B that my mind is allowed to "let go" and transcend the wiles that are experienced every minutes of our lives. It is almost as though I am regressing to more basic and primal emotions emitted from the lower brain. Whether it be a 30 minute jog or a 3 hour epic, the only word to describe what I bestowed with is "oneness." Not clarity, not discernment per se, but oneness. Where I again feel the connection between my physical body and my infinite, ethereal mind.
Imagine a journey to a mountaintop. On that journey, a pathway must be made. Life experiences whether good or bad cause landslides that choke the pathway with rubble and chos. Every step I take while running, is like removing one rock from my pathway. Each stride brings me closer to clearing my way so that when I stop running, when I get back to my life, I can walk clear and open. Not just in body, but in mind as well. Because for me, those two concepts, body and mind, are viscerally connected to the point where you can't be healthy in one without being healthy in the other.
This spirituality that I have described, probably is not what one would typically describe as spirituality. But it is the closest thing that I have found on this planet that can come anywhere close to a truly authentic, spiritual experience. True, I am in the city with cars to dodge and streets to cross, but when I hit my stride, all that fades away like as if into a mist and all I am left with is myself, my legs and my head, slowly clearing my pathway one rock at a time.
My spirituality does not come from overused devotions or from the words of other men. It comes from a connection that I have with God or whoever, that brings a clarity to my path. What I learn about myself every time I put my five-finger shoes on is that I can do it. I can go out and back. I can do what other people can do and I can do what other people can't do. Beyond that superficial attitude, I can do what is me. I can do what allows me to appreciate this body I have been given and to appreciate the place I have been put. Because without me, this place would not exist. Without this place, I could not be.
Someday in the near future, I intend to mix my love of the trails, with my need to run. To put my mind and body against all the might and majesty of the earth and stone. To test myself against the universe with my strength of will. Some days I will pass the test, some days I will only pass by a gasp. What is important, is that I strap my shoes on, and be willing to fight the good fight.
Tuesday, February 12, 2013
Sunday, February 10, 2013
Fathered by God (FbG) Ch1
God is initiating us as men. The wording of this quote implies that initiation is a process that is currently happening this very day with every aspect of our lives. It's not something that will happen, or that has happened or that happens sporadically... it's happening with every breath I take and every decision I make.
John Eldredge's book "Fathered by God," is designed for men. It looks at where we are in society today and some of the issues that have resulted due to the lack of real men and the subjugation of the rite of passage in American society to materialistic and superficial. We lack real men who have the ability to initiate the boys. This imbalance can be balanced! There is so much potential for the boys of this society to intentionally pursue manhood and to bring dignity back to our kind. This process requires tough questions to be answered and Eldredge presents them to us. As I go through this book chapter by chapter, I will bring those questions out and discuss them personally as well as with the theory that I have learned in my educational experience. Sometimes there will be many questions, sometimes there will be only one. The point is not in the number of questions and not even in the answer. It is in the process of thinking about the answer that the value is found.
As I journey through this book, I personally challenge you to answer the questions I am asking. This isn't my problem, it is our problem. We, the men of society, have the choice to continue to be adolescents and be egocentric or to be responsible, initiated men who are ready to journey with others and bring about a change in our society. A change that will return it to a culture.
What is the greatest gift my dad has bestowed upon me?
Early on, my dad was gone a lot. He worked long hours and traveled across the country for days at a time. Thus, my childhood was a journey led by a woman. A very strong woman. My mom was all that a child could wish their mother to be. Dad was there though. One distinct memory that dates back to when we lived in Montana (I was younger than six). I remember getting a bike for some occasion and was learning to ride it without training wheels. There was a small slope as you entered our front yard from one side of the house and it opened up into the wide expanse of the front yard itself. By dad stood behind me, holding the seat so that I could get a good start... and off I went. I don't remember how many times I tried and fell but I distinctly remember falling down and saying I wanted to quit at one point. My dad said no. Keep trying. And so I did, and was successful!
I remember playing catch with my dad in the front yard of the house we lived in for almost 18 years. What i don't remember is the amount of time we spent chasing after baseballs that had been over-thrown, under-thrown and widely-thrown! We would play with balls all the time! Outside, inside, footballs, baseballs, basketballs. All the time testing each other and showing off how hard we could throw or how accurately.
But dad wasn't there to teach me to build a house. He wasn't there to tell me about girls. He wasn't there to help me answer some tough questions at a time when I was asking tough questions. My childhood and adolescence was a time of short clips of dad, but mostly a dad who was working. And he worked hard.
As I look back and struggle with the idea that my dad wasn't there, I wonder if that is true. The older I get and the more clear my understanding of what actually happened and who my dad is, the more I realize who he is, has stuck with me on a deeper level. My dad is not a man of fanfare and wide acclaim. He gets done what he's supposed to get done and looks on. He is a compassionate man who never expects a thank you. He works with his heart, and gives with his heart.
The gifts that my dad has bestowed upon me are not necessarily the gifts of the hands or the feet. But the principles behind those gifts. Dad has showed me how to use those gifts with my heart and with a principle that does leaves little room for egocentrism and selfishness. Dad's gifts to me are ones that allow me to pull everything together and give back to my community with the purpose and conviction that promises growth and development.
John Eldredge's book "Fathered by God," is designed for men. It looks at where we are in society today and some of the issues that have resulted due to the lack of real men and the subjugation of the rite of passage in American society to materialistic and superficial. We lack real men who have the ability to initiate the boys. This imbalance can be balanced! There is so much potential for the boys of this society to intentionally pursue manhood and to bring dignity back to our kind. This process requires tough questions to be answered and Eldredge presents them to us. As I go through this book chapter by chapter, I will bring those questions out and discuss them personally as well as with the theory that I have learned in my educational experience. Sometimes there will be many questions, sometimes there will be only one. The point is not in the number of questions and not even in the answer. It is in the process of thinking about the answer that the value is found.
As I journey through this book, I personally challenge you to answer the questions I am asking. This isn't my problem, it is our problem. We, the men of society, have the choice to continue to be adolescents and be egocentric or to be responsible, initiated men who are ready to journey with others and bring about a change in our society. A change that will return it to a culture.
What is the greatest gift my dad has bestowed upon me?
Early on, my dad was gone a lot. He worked long hours and traveled across the country for days at a time. Thus, my childhood was a journey led by a woman. A very strong woman. My mom was all that a child could wish their mother to be. Dad was there though. One distinct memory that dates back to when we lived in Montana (I was younger than six). I remember getting a bike for some occasion and was learning to ride it without training wheels. There was a small slope as you entered our front yard from one side of the house and it opened up into the wide expanse of the front yard itself. By dad stood behind me, holding the seat so that I could get a good start... and off I went. I don't remember how many times I tried and fell but I distinctly remember falling down and saying I wanted to quit at one point. My dad said no. Keep trying. And so I did, and was successful!
I remember playing catch with my dad in the front yard of the house we lived in for almost 18 years. What i don't remember is the amount of time we spent chasing after baseballs that had been over-thrown, under-thrown and widely-thrown! We would play with balls all the time! Outside, inside, footballs, baseballs, basketballs. All the time testing each other and showing off how hard we could throw or how accurately.
But dad wasn't there to teach me to build a house. He wasn't there to tell me about girls. He wasn't there to help me answer some tough questions at a time when I was asking tough questions. My childhood and adolescence was a time of short clips of dad, but mostly a dad who was working. And he worked hard.
As I look back and struggle with the idea that my dad wasn't there, I wonder if that is true. The older I get and the more clear my understanding of what actually happened and who my dad is, the more I realize who he is, has stuck with me on a deeper level. My dad is not a man of fanfare and wide acclaim. He gets done what he's supposed to get done and looks on. He is a compassionate man who never expects a thank you. He works with his heart, and gives with his heart.
The gifts that my dad has bestowed upon me are not necessarily the gifts of the hands or the feet. But the principles behind those gifts. Dad has showed me how to use those gifts with my heart and with a principle that does leaves little room for egocentrism and selfishness. Dad's gifts to me are ones that allow me to pull everything together and give back to my community with the purpose and conviction that promises growth and development.
Saturday, February 9, 2013
Big Stride, Small Dip
Music is one of those things that we all experience. For many people, it's an experience of feeling and to others it's an emotion that is evoked. I believe music to have emoting qualities. I don't know how, that's something that will be learned in more detail through another class. But here, I will express the feelings I have about a lecture given February 5th at Warner Pacific (feelings are thoughts about emotions).
I am a minority when it comes to music. The music that speaks to me is not looked upon with awe and respect by the average person. Country music is seen as nothing but a lament about loosing the girlfriend/wife, trucks, my dog and beer. I will admit, there are a few songs that fit that criteria and then some, but I never understood why people dislike it with such vehemence. When I look to myself and my own visceral distaste for Hip-Hop and rap music... I suppose I could understand a little.
The lecture given by Dr. Adam Bradley was very insightful. He mentioned a Hip-Hop culture being learned and adopted in five different ways:
I am a minority when it comes to music. The music that speaks to me is not looked upon with awe and respect by the average person. Country music is seen as nothing but a lament about loosing the girlfriend/wife, trucks, my dog and beer. I will admit, there are a few songs that fit that criteria and then some, but I never understood why people dislike it with such vehemence. When I look to myself and my own visceral distaste for Hip-Hop and rap music... I suppose I could understand a little.
The lecture given by Dr. Adam Bradley was very insightful. He mentioned a Hip-Hop culture being learned and adopted in five different ways:
- DJing
- Breaking (break dancing)
- MCing
- Graf (graffiti)
- knowledge
Bradley's approach to the culture of Hip-Hop was through the fifth avenue, that of intellect. I appreciated this approach very much because I have seen or experienced the other four and clearly it has made no connection to me what-so-ever. The last approach however, piqued my interest because it brought to the table something more than just the bling, sex appeal and fame. It brought a quality that I could connect with.
A strange connection that Bradley made was that of American writer Emily Dickinson to the Wutang Clan. Now I have no idea who the Wutang Clan is but I know Emily Dickinson is and lets be clear, she ain't Hip-Hop! What was so awesome about this connection for Bradley though, was that it was his connection. He was able to make a connection between words written by Dickinson and a song by the Clan that brought one very important component to the forefront; lexicon.
In one of my classes, Personality Theory, we discussed the lexical hypothesis. It is basically the idea that language is how we express personality. At least it's how we quantify personality. Thus, if an alien race were to visit earth and learn our lexicon, they could decipher our individual personalities (kinda sorta, you get the idea). So it is through language that we are connected. There is disconnect because of the various languages on this globe, but each lexicon has it's own nuances and specificities. We get lucky in that both Dickinson and the Clan speak through the same lexicon of the English language. Through that, Bradley was able to make the connection and thus allow me to make my own connection between Hip-Hop, beauty, the human condition and myself.
The last thing that Bradley discussed in his lecture, was a three tiered approach to the poetry of Hip-Hop. There was rhythm. He stated that the human voice has a unique rhythm that transcends the use of instruments. It is this instrument of the voice, our own unique voice, that allows us to worship God in our own individual ways. The second tier was rhyme, the play on words that we experience as young children through the writings of Dr. Suess. Bradley argued that we could all come from a different place, use a different form, see through a different context yet demonstrate a singular format when it comes to rhyming. The third and last tier was that of figurative language. An example that Bradley focused on here was that of the pun. Considered by some to be the lowest form of comedy, yet used and appreciated by all. It's through the play on multiple meanings that adds depth to our lexicon.
Through this lecture on the intellectual attributes of Hip-Hop, I have taken large stride and a small dip into a world that I have for so long shunned and shied away from. They are different than me, they have different values than I have. Yet, Hip-Hop uses the same lexicon as I do. It uses the same forms as I do. It feels and emotes the same way I do. Hip-Hop is an expression of the human soul. Who am I to judge the expression of the human soul in this context?
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